How do I deal with this?

How do you be the one who is always so strong for everyone when something goes wrong and how do u try to hold it together for everyone when your losing a parent? Yeah I know my dad was going to die and I never cried or broke down but now I know its getting close I cant deal with it. I dont know how to deal with the fact I am losing my Daddy. Yeah he was hardly around in my life and has never met Hailey or Tyler but he is still my Daddy! How do u deal with this? How do u face the fact that he wont be with u anymore? He wont see ur kids graduate High School. I Know I havent been the best daughter and he hasnt been the best dad. But u learn to forgive and I have forgiven him for everything. I am trying to deal with this but I dont know how to. Dont know how to express how I am feeling or how to control the crying.

But I know God doesnt give us anything we can not handle and I am praying myself and my family can get threw this.

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